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Burkhas For Beer Bellies?
Well, the heat does do strange things to our brains. Among the strangest is the urge it inspires among British men of a certain age to go about their business, dressed only in the skimpiest shorts, beer bellies and man-boobs on display for the world to see.
One of the least pleasant views on Britain's sceptered isle. But stranger still is the mentality of some politicians who hope to slap a ban on these inflated exhibitionists, hoping to use local laws to slap anti-social behaviour orders on men who parade their pot bellies on hot days.
Under the laws, proposed by former local government minister Nicolas Bennett, men would be obliged to wear shirts in shopping centres. Bennett draws parallels between beer-bellied men and youths drinking in public spaces, suggesting legislation similar to that designed to "disperse" yobs from town centres could be used to remove men who dare to bare.
Not surprisingly, his proposals have met with a barrage of criticism. One local council says it would be difficult to enforce. Others, including commentators on the Daily Mail's website, argue that if large sweating men are to be subject to dress codes, perhaps the same could apply to that other peculiarly British eyesore, overweight women who insist on wearing low-cut jeans and cropped tops. Others complained that women displaying their pregnant bellies is offensive, while yet another wondered if the ban might be extended to aggressive tattoos and scantily-clad teenagers.
One can't help but feel that no matter how questionable the taste of some of our countrymen, the moaners might feel happier in Saudi Arabia, where the hot weather can be enjoyed without the view being spoiled by men and women baring their midriffs, or anything else. A dress code for British town centres - what have we come to?
Moreover, the Daily Mail's arch-rival, The Guardian, also carries a story on objectionable nudity, this time the unkempt bare feet and toes sported by men wearing sandals and flip-flops in the city.
"Keeping your feet in good nick is a fundamental obligation of modern masculinity", proclaims one of the interviewees, who runs a pedicure service boasting a 40 percent male clientele. One can imagine the notoriously metrosexual policy bods at New Labour approving of this one: A ban on bare feet who don't get the full grooming treatment might be in order!
